Oh blogger, I'm sorry it's been a while. I really haven't put my thought into posting in here at all. I've been generally in a good mood lately, no complaints. I've had off of work for 4 days now because of "Blizzard 2010" and I don't mind at all. I'll be going back tomorrow and working strong for the rest of the week. I think I took about 4 separate naps yesterday alone, it was truly a beautiful thing. I hope whomever reads this enjoyed their holiday season as it is coming to a close in the next few days with the arrival of the new year. I enjoy the holidays not because of presents or family (I'm sorry!), I just honestly love cream puffs and pumpkin pies. I would like to apologize to my doctors for that and my unregulated glucose levels these last few days.
Like I said before I've been in generally a good mood these past few weeks but today I've kind of taken on an angry mood in the last few hours. I know why of course but who am I to complain on here. I also hate looking back on these entries and see myself complain and be a baby. I hope everything works itself out tonight, I'm not going to bother for the rest of the night. Getting involved and trying really doesn't seem worth it. Oh well, tomorrow will be better and everything can be fixed in a second. Bad moods can turn to good with just one listen of a certain voice. I hope I can do that tonight and if not then I will try again tomorrow. Enjoy your night.
Nicholas.
December 28, 2010
December 13, 2010
December 13th, 2010
Please forgive me for not posting in a few days. Some days I can't wait to write here and other times days pass without me noticing. I've been overtired lately and I'm not sure why. It's probably due to the weather and work and blah blah blah. Yesterday I went out shopping for gifts for my family which was highly unsuccessful. I came home around 3:30 and got into bed with Jaimie and napped the day away. It was pretty perfect. I can only think of a few things that would have made the day complete but that story is for another day. We've been on a pretty good roll lately with not fighting, it's been really nice. It's a good feeling when the person you are with feels the same way back towards you. When you are both on the same "page". It's just going really well right now, that is really the only way I could put it.
The Jets lost yesterday, SAME OLD JETS. There, I said it. But in better news the Rangers absolutely demolished the Capitals. So it all evens out. The first half of the Dexter finale was good and then the last half hour or so I was thoroughly disappointed. Clyde Phillips leaving the show really came to a head last night in the overall writing of the episode.
Nicholas
The Jets lost yesterday, SAME OLD JETS. There, I said it. But in better news the Rangers absolutely demolished the Capitals. So it all evens out. The first half of the Dexter finale was good and then the last half hour or so I was thoroughly disappointed. Clyde Phillips leaving the show really came to a head last night in the overall writing of the episode.
Nicholas
December 8, 2010
December 8th, 2010
I am an extremely cranky bear waking up at 4:45am now that I sleep and love sleeping. I never appreciated sleep so much. Work is starting to get on my nerves. Some people in my office don't know how to take a hint and not knock on my door 10 times a day to shoot the shit. I'm trying to pretend to do work, don't blow my cover. I'm really trying to put my hours at work and work the full day. I am most productive when no one is here but as soon as it hits 10am I start to slack off. I don't know why. I have my one year check up after work today. All will be well, I just know it. You can't spend your life worrying about "what if". I am slowly learning that. It is easier said than done but I am trying.
Yesterday seemed to drag on forever because I couldn't talk to Jaimie all day. She couldn't text at work so without her the day felt like an eternity. I ended up leaving work at just before 3pm and got home in great time. As soon as I walked in the door the suit came off and then got into bed and watched Law & Order :SVU for 3 or 4 hours. I think I've seen every episode of that show except for the new ones.
I heard a new John Mayer song and I immediately think of Jaimie. "Face To Call Home" the song is called. Isn't that what everyone is looking for. Home isn't necessarily a place but a person who makes you feel at home. It is a beautiful feeling. I haven't felt this way in a long time. I want to do all I can for her all the time. You shouldn't feel like you need someone else to complete you. You should feel complete on your own but she makes me feel like I am all she will never need. I feel like me when I am with her. That is an amazing feeling. As cliche as this will sound, it feels good to love and be loved and sometimes that is all you need to get through the day.
Enjoy your day.
Nicholas
Yesterday seemed to drag on forever because I couldn't talk to Jaimie all day. She couldn't text at work so without her the day felt like an eternity. I ended up leaving work at just before 3pm and got home in great time. As soon as I walked in the door the suit came off and then got into bed and watched Law & Order :SVU for 3 or 4 hours. I think I've seen every episode of that show except for the new ones.
I heard a new John Mayer song and I immediately think of Jaimie. "Face To Call Home" the song is called. Isn't that what everyone is looking for. Home isn't necessarily a place but a person who makes you feel at home. It is a beautiful feeling. I haven't felt this way in a long time. I want to do all I can for her all the time. You shouldn't feel like you need someone else to complete you. You should feel complete on your own but she makes me feel like I am all she will never need. I feel like me when I am with her. That is an amazing feeling. As cliche as this will sound, it feels good to love and be loved and sometimes that is all you need to get through the day.
Enjoy your day.
Nicholas
December 7, 2010
December 7th, 2010
I have been sitting at my desk at work all morning and I have gotten nothing done. I can't concentrate. I just keep thinking of the same thing over and over again. I really can't put to words how I feel sometimes. I just want to go home. The year is almost over. This month is new but I feel like it is winding down already.
In other news, some people in your life aren't worth your time. It can be a brother, a sister, a friend, anyone. Don't let things get too one sided because at the end of the day, you're the only one hurting. I have been on both sides of this. It just isn't worth it in the end. When you're going through it you think it will be but when it's over, it's just over. You think that brothers and sisters are for life and so should friends but you realize when you get older you weed out the people who don't matter as much and you hold the ones who matter even close. That is a bond for life.
Nicholas
In other news, some people in your life aren't worth your time. It can be a brother, a sister, a friend, anyone. Don't let things get too one sided because at the end of the day, you're the only one hurting. I have been on both sides of this. It just isn't worth it in the end. When you're going through it you think it will be but when it's over, it's just over. You think that brothers and sisters are for life and so should friends but you realize when you get older you weed out the people who don't matter as much and you hold the ones who matter even close. That is a bond for life.
Nicholas
December 6, 2010
December 6th, 2010
Good Morning readers,
It's only 9:20am and I finished sitting in on all the new hire interviews and they went well. It's pretty much like gym class and you get to pick your teams for softball. Who has the better sales qualities and so on and so forth. To my surprise a girl I went to high school with was one of the new hires. I graduated high school in 2006 and haven't seen too many people I graduated with since so it was definitely a memory overload for the 15 minute interview. My boss and I ended up picking her anyways because we are short one sales team member to begin with so it will be interesting to see how this progresses.
Last night was a good night. Jaimie's night started off stressful and she was being a cranky bear but I hopefully made things better, me or Josh Harnett. Though I have only known her for 10 months it seems like forever. We talked about how we were both trying to feel each other out in the beginning without showing our hand. It's pretty crazy how things happen but I'm glad they did. I wouldn't trade her for anything. Forget the fact that I am in love with her but the pure fact that she is a great person and a friend. Those don't come along very often. Enjoy reading this I have to get some work done. Until tomorrow.
Nicholas.
It's only 9:20am and I finished sitting in on all the new hire interviews and they went well. It's pretty much like gym class and you get to pick your teams for softball. Who has the better sales qualities and so on and so forth. To my surprise a girl I went to high school with was one of the new hires. I graduated high school in 2006 and haven't seen too many people I graduated with since so it was definitely a memory overload for the 15 minute interview. My boss and I ended up picking her anyways because we are short one sales team member to begin with so it will be interesting to see how this progresses.
Last night was a good night. Jaimie's night started off stressful and she was being a cranky bear but I hopefully made things better, me or Josh Harnett. Though I have only known her for 10 months it seems like forever. We talked about how we were both trying to feel each other out in the beginning without showing our hand. It's pretty crazy how things happen but I'm glad they did. I wouldn't trade her for anything. Forget the fact that I am in love with her but the pure fact that she is a great person and a friend. Those don't come along very often. Enjoy reading this I have to get some work done. Until tomorrow.
Nicholas.
December 5, 2010
December 5th, 2010
It feels amazing to be "enough" for someone. That no matter what is going on in their life, you can fix it just by being there for them. Hearing someone say "I Love You baby. Since you've been in my life you're the brightest part of it." That is an amazing thing. And I hope she knows that she is everything and more for me. I wouldn't be where I am today without her. Not a chance. These past 10 months that I've known you have been worth everything. I would change somethings but it would never change the way I feel.
End of cheesy unnecessary blog.
I love you.
Nick.
End of cheesy unnecessary blog.
I love you.
Nick.
December 4, 2010
December 4th, 2010
As I was laying in bed this morning with the wonderful Jaimie I realized what today was. One year ago I underwent a bone marrow transplant and today is my one year anniversary I guess you could say. The first year removed is the most crucial because of the chance of infection and thankfully I only had a few small set backs. I know it is cliche to do this but just thank you to anyone who was there for me. Thank You
Nicholas
Nicholas
December 1, 2010
December 1st, 2010
This is my middle of the night rant. I was laying in bed and thinking and this is what i have too say:
You can't love your boyfriend or girlfriend after a month or two. That is not love, that is just a good feeling you get when you are with someone. A good feeling of spending time with someone. Can the heart grow fond of someone very quickly? Yes, absolutely
Real love is hearing someone throw up because of anxiety and as much it hurts you that they are not there, you're still sitting there saying "it's okay, i'm here for you" even though you want to scream at the top of your lung in pain because you are hurting. That is love at its truest and most simple form.
When I find the rest of my thoughts I will post them
You can't love your boyfriend or girlfriend after a month or two. That is not love, that is just a good feeling you get when you are with someone. A good feeling of spending time with someone. Can the heart grow fond of someone very quickly? Yes, absolutely
Real love is hearing someone throw up because of anxiety and as much it hurts you that they are not there, you're still sitting there saying "it's okay, i'm here for you" even though you want to scream at the top of your lung in pain because you are hurting. That is love at its truest and most simple form.
When I find the rest of my thoughts I will post them
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